Anonymous asked 2 years ago

My mother doesn’t listen to me, accuses me of lying constantly, and refuses to have reasonable discussions. If I bring up a problem, she calls me crazy or unstable and says I need to be in a psych ward. She twists my words and makes wild accusations and screams at me, and does not let me defend myself. She has threatened to kick me out unless I get counselling for trying to fix any misunderstandings we have, and she refuses to listen to reason. She belittles me, throws temper tantrums, and corners me so that she can yell and scream without letting me get a word in edgewise. I wonder if she’s right and I’m the one who is wrong, I question everything I see and think and I find myself isolating myself and feeling hopeless and powerless. I feel I have no control over my life because I have to still rely on her for transport and shelter, though I’m 21, because I make minimum wage and can’t drive yet. I live alone with my mom. I love her, but she just seems so unreasonable and nuts but at the same time, I doubt my perception of things.

Especially today. Today, I got a text from her saying “I can’t believe you lied to your boss.” Now, we work in the same place–a nursing home. She’s a nurse, I work in the kitchen. I had 2 days off, yesterday and today. The other girl who works my shift was fired this week and I covered her shifts–6 days in a row. I requested that my day off yesterday remained when the schedule changed to see my aunt and sick uncle, which Mom and I had planned to do. She, I don’t know why, said I never told her that I had asked for that day not to change on the schedule. I had. All I asked was to keep that one day off this week after working 6 days straight and because we had plans with family. Both very valid reasons. But she thought I “lied by omission” to HER, and to my boss. What? Really…what? And she told my boss I lied to get out of work for a day. Even though I should’ve had the day off, and without it I’d have worked a full 7 days. Now my job is in jeopardy. I was trying to clear this up via text today while Mom was at work and having this passive-aggressive cow at me over texts. My phone died and wouldn’t turn on; I put it on the charger. I walked to work (about a 20-30 minute walk, not terrible, and in broad daylight) in order to clear things up, worried about my job and hoping to settle things down. And of course I again get accused of being unstable and crazy. For trying to clear up this issue. She threatened to send me to the psych ward, and is threatening to kick me out and send me to counselling. For what? I think I’m being reasonable, but she calls me unstable so often that I don’t even know. This isn’t even the first time she’s accused me of lying when I haven’t and blew things out of proportion…But I doubt my own experience. I doubt my sanity and perception. I have no idea what is going on and I feel so powerless.