Yvonne asked 2 years ago

My youngest son never really had good relationship with dad. My husband is true narcissist, didn’t want more kids. Our oldest son and he are tight, and my youngest are boy/girl twins. Being only girl my daughter is his princess. But her brother he has pretty much ignored unless to criticize or find fault. When kids were younger I was his mom and dad, I felt like he needed me more and tried my best to compensate. As result his older brother resents and mistreats cuz he thinks youngest is my “fave” which is not true. Now son is 15 and I see his personality changing, to try to have connection with dad. He is more angry, and depressed gaining wait and turning to food as comfort. I became alcoholic and have tried to be here for him but I think he is hurt and angry at me and can’t trust me. He won’t open up or talk to me about anything. He is doing poor in school, has group of ” friends” who exclude him a lot using lame excuses and only around when they need him for something. So he is alone a lot and I am scared for him. How can I help him develop a sense of self and esteem if I don’t have it myself and still get abused by his dad? How can I help my older son to have more emphathy and love for his brother instead of always trying to make him feel left out or not a part of things?