we work together, he pays for rent and most of the house expenses. I don’t feel secure to get another job and I don’t know how to get self confidence. We have been married 15 years, I have tried to leave him several times and he convinces me to get back, either take me to a trip, or cries, or buy me something or make promises, etc. he uses the kids as an excuse. I feel like in a vicious circle, I don’t know how to escape. he says I am crazy, that I need help and I sometimes feel so depressed that I start to believe is true, it’s when I tell other people what’s going on that they agree that he is the one who needs help. He says that I should be grateful that he has never hit me, but he is verbally abusive and manipulative daily. If i fight him back, he says I need help. I don’t know what to do. I have moved several times with my kids, every time we move I promise them it will be “the last time” they hate moving. I am so tired of moving too. For my kids I need stability, mostly emotionally. What can I do? where can i get help without him knowing what I am doing.